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Bird Jokes


What do you call a minor bird accident?

A feather bender.

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Why did the duck go ring-ring?

He got a phone bill.

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What did the little bird say to the big bird?

Peck on someone your own size.

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What do you call a formal dance for ducks?

A fowl ball.

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What kind of ducks rob banks?

Safe quackers.

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Why was the duck unhappy?

His bill was in the mail.

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Why did the pigeon need to get out?

He was cooped up at home all week.

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Which bird does construction work?

The crane!

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Which birds work underground?

Myna (miner) birds.

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What kind of doctor treats a duck?

A quack doctor!

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What kind of weather excites a pet duck?

Fowl weather, of course!

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What holiday is strictly observed by all birds?

Feather's Day!

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Where can birds play professional baseball?

In the mynah leagues!

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How can you tell a miser from his pet canary?

One's a little cheap, but the other's a little cheeper.

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Sitting on a branch overlooking the parking lot, the pigeons watched as a Mercedes pulled
in below them. "What do you think?" one bird said to the other. "Should we put a deposit on that car?"

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Little Harleigh said to her classmate, "Todd, did you read the story about the emperor who bought a nightingale?" Todd shook his head. "Yes," said Harleigh. "He got it for a song!"

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What did the parrot say when she fell in love with the frog?

Polly wants a croaker!

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What would you name a parrot made out of plastic?

Polly-Esther!

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Who belongs to the P.T.A.?

Parrots and teachers!

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How can you tell that birds like shopping at sales?

They're always saying "cheep-cheep".

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What kind of bird digs for coal?

A mynah!

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Why did the duck put its head in the stream?

To liquidate its bill.

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Why did the duck leave the stream?

It had more interest in the bank.

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Which vacation spot will really make your pet bird sing for joy?

The Canary Islands!

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What kind of fish can you find in a birdcage?

A perch!